I Am Who I Think I Am

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We all have a vision of the person we are. We create that vision in our childhood through osmosis, our vision being influenced by our environment – the people who surround us. So, in a real sense, we are who others think we are. That can be very good or it can be very bad. For the vast majority of those struggling in life, it’s a very bad thing.

Most never take the time to script out the person they want to be. That’s a mistake. When we take control over the person we want to be, the historical influence others exerted on our vision, begin to fade away. When we script who we want to be, we alter whatever vision we previously programmed ourselves to embrace. Scripting the vision of our perfect self is transformative.

At the beginning of 2012 I was struggling in my author business. My book, Rich Habits, had sold only 1,000 copies, typical for most self-published authors. Most self-published authors never sell more than 1,000 copies of their books in an entire lifetime. But I wanted to be a successful author. I wanted to get my Rich Habits message out there. I wanted to positively impact the lives of millions with my research. So, I took a page out of my self-made millionaire playbook (Rich Habits) and scripted my perfect life for the first time.

In my ideal, future life, I decided I wanted to be J.C. Jobs, the main character in Rich Habits. J.C. was a famous self-help author who transformed the lives of millions. He was a frequent guest on T.V. shows and radio shows. He wrote thousands of articles in magazines ad newspapers around the world. He was an icon who freed millions from the slavery that is poverty. And he successful and he was happy.

It’s now nearing the end of 2015. So did my scripting work? I’ll let you be the judge. Here’s what’s happened since the beginning of 2012:

Rich Habits is closing in on 50,000 book sales. Rich Kids, a book I released at the end of 2014, has won two major literary awards and became a bestseller in June of this year. Change Your Habits, Change Your Life, my latest book, will be released shortly. I have been on 14 national and regional T.V. shows and over 2,000 radio stations primarily in the U.S. but also in Canada, Australia and the U.K.. My research has been profiled in dozens of national and international magazines around the world as well as hundreds of online sites, blogs and newspapers worldwide. I have been interviewed by close to 200 podcasters in the U.S., Canada, Australia, U.K., Mexico, Jamaica, Puerto Rico, Israel, New Zealand and a few other countries. I am not J.C. Jobs yet, but I’ve come a long way.

What happened? Every day for 18 months, I continuously read and improved upon the script I created at the beginning of 2012. At some point, I think it was in early 2014, I began to finally see myself as J.C. Jobs. I began to believe.

Scripting works. It brings to the surface the dreams that must be realized in order for you to become the future you. Those dreams infect your subconscious and conscious mind like a virus. They inspire you to develop goals. Goals are the action steps behind each dream. Each dream is like a rung on the ladder of success. Every dream you realize, moves you up the ladder and gets you closer to the top. When you reach the top, you become the future version of you.

Who do you want to be? Do you want to be who others think you are? Or, do you want to be someone entirely different?  Scripting gives you the template for your ideal, perfect life. It’s your GPS to a new life. Scripting provides the dreams, that give birth to the goals, that will help you climb your ladder of success and transform you into who you want to be.

The Secret to Success

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“Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life. Think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success.”  Swami Vivekananda

The secret to success is to focus on one thing you are passionate about and never, ever quit. When you dedicate your life to one thing, you eventually become an expert in that one thing. Passion is the key because passion drives your persistence. Persistence, for most of the self-made millionaires in my study, was never forced. It was a byproduct of their fanatical obsession with one thing they were passionate about. In my Rich Habits Study it took the average self-made millionaire 32 years to accumulate an average of $4.3 million. But for those self-made millionaires who were single-mindedly focused on pursuing something they were passionate about, it only took them 12 years accumulate an average of $7.4 million. So, for those of you who want to “get rich quicker”, find something you love, which you can monetize, and stick with it.

The fact is, unfortunately, most do not succeed in life. Only 1-2% achieve self-made millionaire-type success. What’s worse, the vast majority struggle with poverty, or are one paycheck away from poverty. There’s a reason for this. Those who struggled financially in my study did not invest their life in one individual pursuit.

These individuals suffered from something I call Bright Shiny Object Syndrome – always in pursuit of something new. Those suffering from Bright Shiny Object Syndrome do devote themselves to one thing, if that one thing does not immediately pay dividends. They lose interest and then begin looking for something else. They take their focus off what they were doing and seek out something else to do. Those who suffer from this malady never become expert in any one thing. They are too busy shifting their focus from one thing to the next thing. The sad thing is that, since I completed my research, I see this happening all the time. My eyes are now wide open. I see individuals I know, some of whom I’ve even worked with, who go all in on an initiative for a year, maybe even two years, and then they quit and try something else. Unfortunately, Bright Shiny Object Syndrome is the rule, not the exception.

If you want to succeed in life, you must devote yourself to one thing, every day, and think about it 24/7. You must devote your life, not one or two years, to that one thing. If you’re not doing that, you will not succeed. You may get by and even do OK, earning a respectable living, but you will never realize your true potential in life and you will never become a self-made millionaire. You have one job in life. Find your passion and pursue it until the day you die. When you do, you automatically attract to yourself all of the critical success characteristics that make self-made millionaires so special.

Passionate Practice Prevents Poor Performance

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Daily repetition in developing an expertise or skill is the hallmark of all self-made millionaires. The key is to find that niche in life that you can monetize and which energizes you with passion. Passion provides you with the desire to engage in an activity until you become expert in it. With passion you will be able to power through your mistakes and learn what doesn’t work.

Becoming an expert is the end goal. Experts are paid the most for their knowledge and skills. Expertise expands your means (income) which enables you to accumulate enormous wealth over time. The more you practice, the more money you make and the more wealth you accumulate.

In time, what you practice becomes a habit. The beauty of habits is that they endow you with instantaneous recall as well as effortless performance of your perfected skills. Passionate practice prevents poor performance by perfecting your knowledge and skills.

Find something you are passionate about and that you can monetize and you will want to engage in that activity 24/7. Over time, you will become the best at what you do. You will become so good at what you do that you cannot be ignored.

Double Your Concentration

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In a University of Minnesota survey conducted by Eric Klinger, PhD, he found that the average human being only concentrates on what they’re doing 1/3 of the time. The other 2/3 of the time we are occupied in thinking about relationships, personal problems and people who made us angry. The survey also found that we only spend 6% of the time engaged in problem solving.

One of the hallmarks of self-made millionaires is their ability to focus on goals and their dreams for long periods of time. Passion is the magical ingredient that elevates our concentration level. When we are passionate about what we’re doing we don’t have to rely on willpower, a limited resource, and we don’t experience decision fatigue. Passion puts our brain into overdrive without the associated decline in cognitive function, as with ordinary willpower. You cannot will your way to success. Success is a byproduct of being passionate about what you do for a living. Find something you love and you double your brain power.

Take a Sleep Snack

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According to the National Sleep Foundation, humans are the only mammals who do not regularly nap during the day. The need to nap is hardwired into our DNA. One of the most important purposes of napping is to restore willpower. Willpower is a finite resource. When it’s low (known as decision-fatigue) it causes us to do things and say things that create most of the problems in our lives. Loss of willpower makes us more susceptible to addictions, moral lapses, frivolous spending, outbursts of anger, relationship problems and every sort of lapse in judgement normally prevented by our ability to control destructive impulses. Loss of willpower results in a loss of self-control.

The key to staying on course for a successful life is to preserve willpower for activities that move us forward in life and help us realize our dreams and accomplish the goals behind those dreams. Napping restores willpower and helps “clean” the brain of damaging plaque that builds up during the day, making the brain more efficient and healthier.

So, the next time you find yourself struggling to concentrate or focus on a task, take a 30 minute map. It will restore your energy, willpower and help clean your brain so that you can improve your performance and increase your ability to accomplish your goals and dreams.

3 Types of Rich People

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I’ve been studying the wealthy and the poor for nearly 12 years now. One of the things that I’ve noticed is that almost 100% of the time the media misinforms its readers with respect to the definition of wealth. So, I thought I’d clear it up for you using the same language used by the media.

Three Classes of Rich:

  1. Affluent – These are individuals with net assets (assets minus liabilities) of between $100,000 – $1 million.
  2. High Net Worth – These are individuals with net assets (assets minus liabilities) of between $1 million and $3 million.
  3. Ultra High Net Worth – These are the individuals with net assets (assets minus liabilities) $3 million and above.

In my Rich Habits Study only Ultra High Net Worth individuals made the cut. But, in addition to having an Ultra High Net worth, in my study they needed to also have an annual gross income of $160,000 or more. Below is the two-part test every Ultra High Net Worth individual needed to satisfy in order to meet my definition of Rich:

  1. Net Assets of $3.2 million or more AND
  2. Gross Income of $160,000 or more.

Some might argue that those individuals who meet the High Net Worth category of between $1 million and $3 million are “Rich” as well. And you might be right. In order for the High Net Worth individuals to be considered “Rich”, however, they would very likely need to live what I call a minimalist lifestyle. A minimalist lifestyle is one where the individual either lives below their means or lives within their means. Examples always work best so let me give you one. Let’s say you have net assets totaling $2 million. And let’s say that that $2 million is sitting in an annuity or some other type of guaranteed investment kicking off 4% of guaranteed annual taxable income, or $80,000. If you are in the 20% Federal and State tax bracket that leaves you with $64,000. If on this $64,000 you are able to do the things you want to do in life and, at the same time, meet all of your living expenses then you are “Rich”. You don’t need to work in order to earn any income because you have more than enough income to live the life you want to live.

Now, you might also argue that 4% is too conservative a number and that it is possible to earn more income than 4% on your $2 million. This is called chasing yield and whenever you chase yield you must take on additional risk. The downside of finding an investment that pays more than 4% is the potential that that investment might return less than 4% during downturns in the economy or the investment marketplace. There are plenty of investment options out there that guarantee between 4% – 5% return without taking on any unnecessary risk. But there are not many investments out there that guarantee more than 5%. (Disclosure: my advice to you would be to find a qualified professional who can help you meet your investment goals.)

Those who are truly wealthy do not need to “work”. Their net assets generate all the income they need to live the “rich life”. The rich life means you can do as you please with your time, live the life you want to live and not have to worry about working to earn income in order to live that life.

 

The Power of Focus is God’s Gift to Humanity

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Most are completely oblivious to their own behaviors, habits and thinking as well as conversations of others, actions of others and their surroundings. Study after study has been conducted regarding this and they even came up with a phrase to describe it – Inattentional Blindness.

The main cause of this Inattentional Blindness is the brain’s inability to multi-task – to consciously do two things once. For the most part we are only able to focus on one thing at a time. Everything else simply fades away, ignored by our conscious mind. Our brain’s Reticular Activating System (RAS) blocks all sensory input, other than that input needed to complete the task at hand. This RAS will only deviate from this filtering function when something unexpected or novel comes to its attention. Example, you are walking down the street texting on your cell phone and a person in a monkey suit walks by you. Suddenly, your RAS nudges you to stop what you’re doing and take notice. Sometimes, however, when our focus on a task is so intense, even the RAS is unable to divert our attention. The ability to focus is extremely powerful.

While this might appear to be an inherent deficiency, it isn’t. The power to focus and ignore almost everything outside our focus is why humanity has been able to send a man to the moon, build the Brooklyn Bridge, split the atom and achieve so much. The ability to focus so intently on one thing is actually our strength. It is the reason why famous, successful people like James Cameron (director of Terminator movies, Titanic and Avatar) Jim Carrey (famous comedian/actor) and JK Rowling (Harry Potter author) can lift themselves out of incredible poverty and magically transform themselves into self-made millionaires. All three, at one time, were so poor their home was their car.

Unfortunately, the vast majority of individuals hold on to the belief that it is virtually impossible for a poor person to break free of poverty and become rich. This one limiting belief is the reason why we have so many stuck in a generational cycle of poverty and the reason why so many politicians are therefore able to buy the votes of the poor by simply offering them entitlements.

Any individual who accepts this belief is unable to use the power of focus to rid themselves of their adverse financial circumstances. And that is unfortunate, for the power of focus is the poor person’s escape hatch. It can lift any individual out of the most dire of financial circumstances. The power of focus is truly God’s gift to humanity.

Courage and Fear Wage War Inside Each One of Us – You Choose Who Wins

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“Mommy, my teacher asked me if I would like to play the role of Juliet in the school play. She said I had the perfect face and voice for the part.”

The little girl’s mom finished drying off a dinner plate, placed it in the cub bard and turned to her daughter. “Well, what did you say, Jodie?”

“I said thank you but I will need to talk to my mom tonight. My teacher said OK, talk to your mom and let me know tomorrow.”

The mother, reaching for another plate, asked, “why do you need to talk to me about playing Juliet in the play?” The little girl’s eyes widened and the mother could see tears welling up inside. She knew immediately what the problem was. She put down the plate she was cleaning, took her daughter’s hand and together they walked to the kitchen table and sat down. The mother looked her little girl in the eyes and began to speak.

“Every human being is born with two wolves inside their body. One is a dark, negative, angry wolf, filled with fear. The other is a bright, positive, joyful wolf, filled with courage. Only one wolf can survive inside the body. This means one must die. Both wolves constantly fight with one another inside our bodies. They fight for their lives every day until only one survives. Do you know which one survives?”

The little girl, with tears streaming down her cheeks, sniffled, looked up at her mom and said. “I hope the wolf filled with courage is the one who survives.”

The mother eyed her little girl kindly and said. “The one who survives is the one who you feed the most. If you want the courageous wolf to survive inside you, you must feed it more than the fearful wolf.”

The little girl smiled and stood up. “I’m going to tell my teacher yes first thing tomorrow.” The mother smiled back. “Wonderful Jodie, now go upstairs and brush your teeth.”

The very next day little Jodie Foster skipped up to her teacher’s desk, and with a broad smile said to her teacher, “I spoke to my mom last night and the answer is yes!”

When God Calls …. Pick Up The Phone

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I spent most of my adolescence obsessed with becoming a priest. I even visited a local seminary (St. Charles Seminary), spoke to a few priests and signed up for an introductory program they offered anyone who thought they had a calling. And I thought I had a calling. But I was not certain I had a calling. I understand now that when you get a calling, there is no uncertainty. It’s crystal clear. You just know it.

Most, unfortunately, never find their calling. It’s an unfortunate byproduct of modern day life. How many grew up playing baseball, basketball, soccer, football, swimming, tennis, etc? Most likely, you spent your childhood focused on two or three activities. With such limited exposure to novel things, it’s virtually impossible for anyone to find their calling.

Finding your calling in life requires exposure to dozens of activities. You simply cannot learn what talents you possess if you are limited to two or three activities growing up. For those few who do find their calling, that means they have unearthed their latent inner talents. Talents are genetically unique to each individual. Every person possesses certain talents that are specific to their genetic makeup. It’s the job of parents, mentors and educators to help kids uncover those talents.

Regrettably, most live a lifetime ignorant of their talents. Our education system, for the most part, is to blame. We are all required to follow a specific curriculum, dictated by a system whose primary objective is to teach fundamentals that will enable each individual to get a job. Getting a job is in the best interest of society. By society, I mean government. It’s in government’s best interest to have as many employees as possible. This ensures a steady stream of tax revenue in the form of federal withholding taxes. Government does not want entrepreneurs, or, more specifically, it does not want those who pursue a dream. Dreams take too long to create income that can be taxed. I find this counterintuitive, since it is those very dreamers who change society and produce the most wealth for society. Microsoft, Apple, Google, Waste Management, GE and many other companies were started by dreamers.

Dreamers are special. They represent a small, fractional portion of society who experience a calling. Thanks to my research (Rich Habits Study), I was fortunate to have been able to interview 177 such dreamers. These 177 self-made millionaires all shared one thing in common – they were doing something for a living that they loved. They were all pursuing their calling in life.

When you find your calling, it changes your life and it changes everyone Else’s life. It triggers the discovery of an inner genius possessed by virtually every human being from the moment of birth. Pursuing a dream as your calling unleashes something I like to call The God Gene. This God Gene endows every human being with god-like creativity and insight. Those who pursue their calling in life trigger this God Gene. As a result, they go from ordinary to extraordinary. Pursuing a dream also enables you to tap into a hitherto dormant passion that transforms even the most lethargic into the hardest, most persistent worker. It increases your IQ exponentially, allowing you to see opportunities and overcome seemingly intractable obstacles. It allows you, for the first time, to see your future clearly. It really is magic. But it’s more like witnessing a miracle in real time. When you find your calling in life, it is the closest human beings get to actually talking with God. And when God calls, pick up the phone.

Reacting to Anger

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We’ve all experienced it. Someone at work, at home or in your inner circle simply unloads on you for some reason. You may have done something to trigger the outburst or the anger is unwarranted or exaggerated.

Most respond by getting angry and will either internalize or externalize their own anger. But before you do, you should know this statistical fact: three out of every five individuals you come into contact with in life are going through a personal crisis of some sort.

It could be an illness in the family, a financial problem, an unexpected pregnancy, marital problems, etc. It may very well be that you happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time when this someone unloaded on you.

Armed with this knowledge, the best course of action is to not react at all. Simply acknowledge the other person’s anger, apologize for whatever they think you did to them and forget about it. In all likelihood, if it turns out to be just that, a personal crisis they were going through, they will eventually apologize or come close to apologizing.

But I don’t want to become a doormat, allowing people to walk all over me.

This is a completely different issue. If an individual repetitively unloads on you, this is not crisis driven. This is habit driven. These types of individuals are locked into a negative mental outlook. They will continue to unload on you and make your life miserable. Misery does love company.

In this case you have two choices:

  1. Tell them to stop and get control of their emotions and come back to discuss the matter when they have regained their composure. This will work in most cases. But if it does not work then you have to move on to the second choice.
  2. Eliminate this negative individual from you life.

There are some individuals who simply have developed the bad habit of expressing their anger. These individuals function from a negative mental outlook and will eventually drag you down and turn your life into a living hell. You do not want to associate with negative people. You want to only associate with positive individuals. Negative people will drag you down and make you negative. Positive people will lift you up and make you positive. It is the Law of Association at work.