As many of you who follow me know, I’ve spent the past 12 years researching habits. Why?

Because 40% of all of your daily behaviors and thinking are habits. Forty percent of the time you are on autopilot. And habits, I learned, are the reason you live on the beach in a big house or in a slum in the inner city. Habits are why you’re able to send your kids to the best private schools or must settle for public schools. Habits dictate your financial circumstances in life and your happiness or unhappiness.

Because I do a lot of media interviews, I am asked a lot of questions. One of the questions I get asked often is: Are there differences between the habits of men and women?

From my research, I’ve identified certain habits that separate men and women. Here’s a sampling of seven major habit differences from my research:

#1 Gambling

Women gamble less than men. Not only do fewer women gamble, but for the women who do gamble, they gamble less frequently.

#2 Risk Tolerance

Men have a higher risk tolerance than women. Men are by nature hardwired to be more aggressive than women. This aggressive nature gives men a higher risk threshold. This is a good thing and a bad thing. A low risk tolerance is a good thing when it comes to making big purchasing decisions. Women are more apt to study the details of a major purchase than men. The devil is always in the details, so understanding the details can save you from making a big purchasing mistake.

#3 Reading

Women read more than men. That’s the good news. The bad news is that women read more for entertainment. Men, conversely, read more for learning and self-improvement.

#4 Communication

Women are better communicators than men. In fact, the average woman speaks 7,000 words a day compared to 2,000 for men. Good communication is a Rich Habit. Miscommunication damages relationships, businesses, negotiations and can lead to mistakes and failure. Because women are better communicators, they are better at seeking feedback. Feedback is critical to understanding what to do and what not to do. Good feedback minimizes mistakes and reduces the probability of failure.

#5 Creativity

Men are more creative than women. This is physiological. Men have a smaller corpus collosum. The corpus collosom is the bundle of neural never fibers that separates the right hemisphere of the brain from the left. Recent studies on creativity have shown that those with a smaller corpus collosum are hardwired for greater creativity.

#6 Organizational Skills

Women have greater organizational skills than men. Because they pay more attention to details and are more cautious by nature, they tend to do more planning. This makes them better organized when it comes to facts then men.

#7 Saving Money

Women are better at saving money. They are more cautious with their money. They comparison shop to get the best deals. They look for discounts.

It is possible to achieve 100% of your goals. In this video, Michael Yardney and I discuss some of the strategies I uncovered in my Rich Habits research that make it possible for anyone to put goal achievement on autopilot.

Many of the self-made millionaires in my study made a habit of building relationships with other rich, successful people. In fact, 89% of the self-made’s in my study said they forged this habit prior to becoming wealthy.

Successful people have the ability to help you in so many ways by:

• Mentoring you
• Opening up doors that would otherwise be closed
• Funding your dream
• Connecting you with other influencers
• Sharing their wisdom and advice
• Providing you with critical feedback

But the reality is that rich people are not going to be interested in building a relationship with someone who doesn’t look the part. If you want to become part of the inner circle of the wealthy, you must create the perception that you are someone they would build a relationship with. Here are some tips on exactly how to do that:

Dress the Part

You don’t need to be rich to buy rich clothes. Eight percent of the self-made millionaires in my Rich Habits study bought their clothes at goodwill stores. They always bought good quality clothes and then had them tailored, saving them hundreds of dollars for each outfit.

Tips on Dressing the Part:

• Work and Job Interviews – Some professions have special purpose clothing like construction, roadwork, electricians etc. If you work in an office, dress like your boss or your boss’s boss. In some offices its business casual, in others it’s a suit and tie for men. For woman its slacks, or skirts with open collars, heels or no heels are ok.
• Weddings, Wakes, Funerals –  In most cases this will be suit and tie for men. For women it’s the same as work clothes but many women like to wear more formal gowns or a more stylish cocktail dress, usually worn with heels. Some cultures have special dress codes you need to be aware of.
• Formals – Usually formals are black tie optional, black tie or white tie for men. Optional usually means a dark suit, tie or black bow tie, dark shoes. Black tie means black tuxedo, dark shoes, white tie means black tailcoat, white wing-collar shirt, white bow tie, black shoes for men. For women it’s a long formal gown or short cocktail dress or dressy long skirt and top, usually worn with heels. White ties are very rare.

Drive the Part

If you pull up to a meeting with a rich person in a beat-up jalopy of a car, it will create a bad impression. So, what can you do? Fifty-five percent of the self-made millionaires in my study purchased used, good quality cars. Typically, these were cars that were coming off a three year lease and whose value had depreciated significantly, making the purchase affordable.

Look the Part

What does looking the part mean? Besides the clothing it includes a well-groomed haircut, white teeth, good posture, strong handshake and an enthusiastic smile. These things cost very little but pay huge dividends.

Act the Part

Do you have good etiquette? Are you a positive, upbeat person? Do you look people in the eye while they are talking to you? In conversations, do you focus on the other person – do you ask them questions about their life?

You will find rich, successful people at networking events, charitable events, trade group events, golf outings, on the tennis court, boating, at conferences, on the board of directors at local non-profits, at wakes, funerals, at weddings, on vacation, in pubs and at restaurants. Acting the part is a habit you must forge. It must become part of your everyday behavior because you never know when you will run into one of the rich and successful. If you assume everyone you meet is successful, then you will make an effort to act the part every day.

Tips on How to Act the Part:

#1 Good Communication

•   Look everyone in the eye for no more than 5 seconds at a time, then divert your glance for another 5 seconds. Practice will turn this into a habit.
• Not every thought that comes into your head should come out of your mouth. Vet your thoughts. Speaking your mind does not mean sharing every thought. Some thoughts are not appropriate and could cause irreparable damage to your relationships.
• Never criticize, condemn or complain about anyone to another relationship. It’s a giant red flag. People will assume that you are bad mouthing them and will try to stay away from forming any strong relationships with you.
• Never gossip. Most gossip is bad, negative and damages relationships.
• Gather as much information about your relationships as you can. At a minimum gather the following information: birthdays, hobbies, interests, schools attended, where they grew up, current family background (married? kids?), where they live, dreams or goals they are pursuing.
• Make Hello Calls, Happy Birthday Calls and Life Event Calls.

#2 Good Eating Habits:

• As soon as you sit in your chair take the napkin off the table and drape it over your lap.
• Never begin eating until everyone has their meal.
• Never chew with your mouth opened.
• Never talk while you’re chewing your food.
• Never dip any food you’re eating into a sauce everyone is using.
• Don’t wolf down your food. Eat at the same pace as everyone else at the table.
• Never hold a spoon, fork or knife with your fist.
• Outside fork is for salads, inside fork for the meal.
• Never make gestures while your utensils are in your hands.
• Never reach for anything like salt and pepper. Always ask someone to pass things like that.
• Don’t slouch at the table. Sit straight up.
• After the meal, excuse yourself and go to the bathroom and make sure you don’t have any food in your teeth. Carry a toothpick or something similar in your wallet or purse wherever you go.

#3 Introduce Yourself Properly at Events:

1. Smile
2. Firm Handshake
3. Make Eye Contact
4. In one sentence explain who you are, why you’re there and who you know at the event
5. Ask Questions About the Person You are Introducing Yourself to. See list of questions to ask on my website

#4 Good Manners:

• Yes
• Please
• Thank you
• Excuse me when interrupting or entering a conversation
• Don’t interrupt someone while they are talking
• Don’t roll your eyes when someone says something you disagree with
• Don’t look away when someone is talking to you
• Never check your cell phone when talking to someone
• Stay positive and keep criticisms and negative comments to yourself
• Compliment, compliment, compliment
• Thank anyone hosting an event, dinner etc.
• Never curse or use inappropriate language during social events
• Never be rude

Author: Jennifer Outram, SEO & Digital Marketing Specialist  Big Leap, LLC jen@bigleap.com

If you’ve recently become self-aware of your spending habits, it probably means something bad happened. Maybe you were hit with a slew of overdraft charges, had your card declined, or saw a ding to your credit score from missed payments or too high of a debt-to-income ratio.

You may feel bad and guilty about these things, but you’ve now been sufficiently humbled enough to admit your problem and begin changing your habits and rebuilding your credit. And here are five ways to get you started on the path to better financial decisions

Budget and Inventory

Find out what went wrong. Know your numbers – your income, how much your bills are each month, how much you spend on coffee, gas, groceries, etc. This will give you a clearer picture of where your money is going. Once you realize that you’re blowing a huge chunk of money at Starbucks or online shopping, you can start setting specific goals and boundaries for your spending.

Cash is Key

Now that you know how much comes in and how much goes out on bills and necessities, it’s time to set limits on your discretionary spending. The best way to do this is to convert to cash. Allot yourself an amount for clothing, coffee, or other “fun” purchases, and take out that amount in cash. The most important part – LEAVE YOUR CARDS AT HOME. I know, crazy, right? But when you have the back-up of your cards, you’ll find yourself quickly rationalize spending more than you rationed because you can “just throw the rest on the card.” This will add up, so be disciplined with your cash.

Create a Vision Board

Do some real soul-searching and figure out what motivates you to change your habits. Maybe it’s a trip, maybe it’s retirement, maybe it’s to lose weight, maybe it’s simply to have the security of an excellent credit score and a comfortable savings account. Whatever it is, make a visible reminder that will help keep you motivated. Hang a picture of your vacation destination in your office or as your screensaver, create a poster with a gauge you can fill in as you hit different savings goals, or a picture of a healthier you that you want to get back to. Whatever it is, remind yourself of it as often as you can to help keep your spending in check.

Dedicate someone to be your second opinion

When you’re in the moment, you may think that those shoes really can’t wait, and you need them here and now. But after a few months of sitting in your closet, you might see them and realize they aren’t as cute as they looked in the store lights. This is where your designated second opinion comes in. Before you’re tempted to purchase something impulsively, take a picture and send it to this person, and get their opinion on how important it is. Obviously, you’ll want to tell them of their role beforehand, and that your goal is to cut back on spending. They will help talk you down when the pressure is hard.

Skip the cart

Shopping carts are big and getting bigger. Seriously. If it’s just a habit to grab a cart when you go shopping, opt for a basket instead. You won’t be able to fit as much and your arm will get tired, so you’ll naturally shop and spend less. This will help you stick to your list and avoid impulse shopping, so skip the cart and reach for a basket or your own arms instead.

These tips can help you gain control of your finances and rein in your spending.